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It’s been mentioned a few times that the exploits and antics of our nine-month-old Dachshund, Annette Skywalker Bacavis, would make for hilarious stories on their own. I can’t disagree with this fact; she is a riot and a half! So where better to tell such stories than my all-too-vacant blog?

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I ran the idea past Annette this evening and she pointed out that my content is so infrequent and random already, that her reoccurring guest spot could only increase readership. Or it was something like that. Honestly, she was more interested in the increase of dog treats and toys. This is how I pay her royalties.

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As I type this now, my husband is walking around the apartment telling the dog, “I’m ignoring you–you will not bark and bite at me!”. She’s following him and making it very clear that “You will not ignore me when I bite and bark at you! You will not!”

Don’t get the wrong idea about Nettie; she’s not aggressive or even snappy. She usually only bites when she has to go poop (does this mean she’s anal retentive?). We can’t solve the mystery of the pre-poop biting. She’s also a very quiet dog, unless she’s having a conversation with us. She only barks when she feels she has suffered a great injustice, like not being the center of attention every waking moment. She’s just a little crabby right now because she’s been two weeks in the cone of shame after her Luxating Patella surgery. Her active lifestyle has slowed down while she recovers, so she’s got a lot of pent-up feelings and unused energy.

Earlier today, she clearly needed to blow off some steam. I took her outside to the park so she could sit in the grass and enjoy the fresh air. Apparently, the park must be swarming with Pokemon, because a crowd of seven teenage boys were out there catching them with their cellphones. The sight of these giddy teens and their Pokemon ecstasy was too much for Annette. She marched right up to them and let loose a barrage of angry Dachshund barks. The entire mob of Pokemon masters jumped in surprise and then fled the vicinity. I can only assume Annette either hates gamers, or she was letting them know that all Pokemon found in this park belong to her. Because the law of Dachshund property extends even into the public sector.

Whatever her reasoning was, she turned to me with a very smug look on her Dachshund face before squatting to pee in her now emptied park.

You can now expect a weekly note from Annette!